[Enhancement] Wait apply finish out of tablet meta lock when set tablet state as SHUTDOWN (backport #56266)

[mergify]

Why I'm doing:

In current impl, when set state as SHUTDOWN for primary key tablet, BE will wait until apply task has been finished inside the tablet meta lock leading many lock contention problem. But it is no need to hold the tablet meta lock when waiting the finishing of the background apply task.

What I'm doing:

Lock free for tablet meta lock to wait the apply task before setting the state as SHUTDOWN.

Fixes #issue

What type of PR is this:

• BugFix
• Feature
• Enhancement
• Refactor
• UT
• Doc
• Tool

Does this PR entail a change in behavior?

• Yes, this PR will result in a change in behavior.
• No, this PR will not result in a change in behavior.

If yes, please specify the type of change:

• Interface/UI changes: syntax, type conversion, expression evaluation, display information
• Parameter changes: default values, similar parameters but with different default values
• Policy changes: use new policy to replace old one, functionality automatically enabled
• Feature removed
• Miscellaneous: upgrade & downgrade compatibility, etc.

Checklist:

• I have added test cases for my bug fix or my new feature
• This pr needs user documentation (for new or modified features or behaviors)
  • I have added documentation for my new feature or new function
• This is a backport pr