[release-21.0] Binlog: Improve ZstdInMemoryDecompressorMaxSize management (#17220)

[vitess-bot]

Description

This is a backport of #17220

[vitess-bot]

Review Checklist

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[codecov]

Codecov Report

All modified and coverable lines are covered by tests ✅

Project coverage is 67.53%. Comparing base (38e1f84) to head (f3404b8).
Report is 1 commits behind head on release-21.0.

Additional details and impacted files

@@               Coverage Diff                @@
##           release-21.0   #17241      +/-   ##
================================================
+ Coverage         67.49%   67.53%   +0.03%     
================================================
  Files              1570     1570              
  Lines            251384   251389       +5     
================================================
+ Hits             169684   169774      +90     
+ Misses            81700    81615      -85     

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