refactor: add extension_kwargs kwargs and nitpicky stuff

[tlambert03]

While playing with spatial-graph, I found that I wanted the ability to pass define_macros to the Extension object... so this - adds **extension_kwargs: Any to the compile_module signature

while doing that, I, erm... got carried away and did all the nitpicky stuff that I would have eventually wanted to do, including:

• adding type hints to everything and enable strict mypy
• use dynamic single-sourced versioning from git tags
• add a couple rules for ruff, importantly including isort
• avoid private imports from Cython
• embellished docstrings and cleaned up formatting (went with numpy out of habit/preference, but if you want to go back to rst format we can do that)
• minor adjustments to the compile_module function itself for brevity/clarity.

cc @funkey

[funkey]

Holy cow, witty got totally talleyed!

This is great, thanks for making this a better library ❤️

I have just one request: please add yourself to the list of authors if that's okay with you :)

[funkey]

And a question: should the module hash now also depend on extension_kwargs? And if so, should we do the same for extra_{compile,link}_args?

I am leaning towards yes, since both can change the resulting binary.

[tlambert03]

And a question: should the module hash now also depend on extension_kwargs? And if so, should we do the same for extra_{compile,link}_args?

yes, I'm afraid it should. Which is a little annoying 😂 ... lemme do that

[funkey]

Splendid, thanks a lot!